How do you ensure a memorable first time?

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Answered by: MELISSA, An Expert in the Dating and Sex Category
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Ensuring a memorable first time with the one your are dating has little to do with the bedroom scene and everything to do with the quality of your time together. Before any couple, adult or adolescent, can (or should) reach such extravagant expressions of affection, the care, thoughtfulness and love (or deep, intense like) must first be played out in the dating arena. There are limitless possibilities for making the first date or frate (friendship date) a memorable occasion.

It may seem old-fashioned, but any man who is interested in dazzling his lady-friend will take the lead and plan a day that is tailor-made for her. This is the date where she will unequivocally see herself as the muse of your inspired plan. Therefore, before you can ask her out, you need to have done your homework. During those "hey, let's get to know each other" talks, ask her appropriately probing questions and memorize her answers (at least enough to use the information in your planning!). Yes, it's a recon mission and guess what? She expects you to use that information. However, be sure to take liberties in inserting yourself into the plans. At the end of the day, she wants to go home realizing that it was a date planned with her in mind that both of you shared. If you worship her too much, you may be creating a monster and the wrong kind of "memorable first time". If the day seems all about your likes, she may humor you and, later, defriend you on Facebook once she gets home.

In light of today's uber-woman, it may be hard for women to allow a man to take the lead. Many women have become independent, self-efficient, professionals who take initiative and take charge. But, deep down, they have a desire to be led by a courteous, fun, intelligent man when it comes to dating. It is imperative for the ladies to allow the gents to be, well, gents! Ladies, all you need to know is the dress code and the cost. Any decent man will tell you outdoors, casual, elegant, or what you had on the other day was terrific and that's it! Bring your money anyway, but you should never need it for the date he has planned. Be aware of the man who wants to go "dutch" or plays the "equality card" and wants to split the bill. He is not ready to be serious about you, and that's okay, as long as the feeling is mutual.

What memorable, amazing, first-impression, I-fantasize-about-our-date-all-the-time occasion should you plan? Any specifics that one would suggest at this point may very well limit your creativity. Plan a date where she is the star and you are more than happy to be by her side and share in the stardom. Take risks; she'll appreciate your boldness. And, have fun! Leave all of the deeply-probing life-changing questions on your desktop (ladies, this means you!). With time, (and hopefully, marriage), ConEdison, Natori, Trojan and KY will be a part of the festivities.

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